Bar-ward Ho!
Sometimes it is the Battlecry!
other times it is the retreat.
It does not fix problems
in fact it often creates them
or makes existing ones worse.
Yet, the service it provides,
the sanctuary and warmth
in this often cold, grey
assembly-line world
is worth every hangover
3-fold.
© Paul Tristram 2013
I Can’t Man, I’ve Got A Conscience
“The answer is a big, fat No!
I want absolutely no part of it.
It’s not my thing, not my style,
not my way.
I’ve seen enough prison
and I’m only just starting
to sleep properly
in like…FOREVER!
I’m not jeopardizing my sanity,
freedom & marriage
over attitude & bullshit!
Go and speak to someone else.”
© Paul Tristram 2013
They Jail People Like Me
They lock us up in towers,
down in damp dungeons
or on islands miles out to sea.
Because we ask questions,
walk
sideways
instead
of
straight
ahead
and don’t always do what we’re told.
We listen to commonsense instead of leaders,
learn from our own mistakes,
we are not perfect and do not wish to be.
We are not always right and that’s just fine.
But we are REAL!
and that’s what matters
in this constant assembly-line
of cardboard cut-outs.
We are the Van Gogh splash of Yellow
across the Daily Factory Grey.
© Paul Tristram 2013
If I Knew You Were Coming…..I’d Have Poisoned The Cake!
Your surprise visits upset me
but my wife feels sorry for you.
Your insecurity is offensive
“Paul doesn’t like me, does he?
What have I done to upset him?”
“It’s not like that, he’s a writer,
he’s not interested in gossip
and he likes being by himself!”
Explains my wife tactfully.
This is my fucking house
and I’m stood out in the back garden
smoking a cigarette with the dog.
“She’ll be here another 3 fucking hours,
you just watch!”
I mutter to the dog.
Then opening up the shed door
we both take refuge inside
where I have a 12 pack of tall
‘Old Speckled Hen’ beer cans.
An electric light,
3 bags of beef hula hoops,
this notebook and pen,
a baseball bat and a sword
and a unread copy of
George Orwell’s
‘Down And Out In Paris
And London.’
Thank fuck I’m getting more prepared
for your little surprise visits.
© Paul Tristram 2013
