lost and found


an old man got

arrested the other



a ring he claimed

was lost was found

in the panties of a

3 year old little girl


i was hoping he was

going to tell the cops

it was a magic trick

gone awry


but he confessed to

some touching down



which made me wonder

how many other times

did he play lost and

found with the kids




all the curves

where i like



i can’t help but

think about you

sitting on my

face within

thirty seconds

of meeting you


it tends to make

hello a little odd


while pretending

i’m listening

and getting lost

in your eyes


i’m actually


sliding your

panties to the

side and working

my tongue like a

version of me

twenty years



yes, i’ll have

another drink


it’s not often

i eat chicken

wings with a



countless years of just taking it



forgotten and

left for dead


the real reason

i hate myself

is i allowed

the pain to




it’s incredibly

hard to stand

up for oneself

after countless

years of just

taking it


wanting change

is a myth


we want others

to change


leave my utopia

as it is


violence, murder


and deceit


you want change


sometimes you

have to dance with

the devil to get it


and i don’t mind

playing with evil

under a full moon


all my other choices

got me here


the silence you desperately need


harrowing nightmares


fucked up secrets

that no child should

have to bear for

any length of time


let alone an entire life


you can smell the

guilt in the air


hiding behind cheap

perfume and whatever

douchebag body spray

is hot at the moment


try to find an awkward

pause where you can

fake a laugh


or a cry


or whatever emotion

you need to drive

the demons away


seek out the silence

you desperately need


grab your favorite book

and pretend that reading

in the dark gives you

special powers that the

rest of the world should

be very worried about




a hearty chuckle when

you think back to the

innocence of your youth


how it was robbed from

you in your grandmother’s

bathroom by a curious



you can’t help but think

she wasn’t fully aware


but you’re more

comfortable being

a victim than an




rational thought never

found a home in your

abused mind


and there is never

enough alcohol when

you really need to kill

the pain


yet you know at the

heart of the matter


you wouldn’t change

a thing


this is who you are


change is for those who

are not comfortable being


  1. nessajay says:

    That’s brave writing.

  2. Fucking loved them all…

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