The Best Way to Treat a Husband as an Ex
Tell him he is stupid, an asshole,
mother fucker.
Then he wants to get her
to calm down.
You never have sex with me anymore
she said.
So he goes to his side of the bed
and she calls 911.
Then he goes to a messily room
upstairs five minutes later
the cops come in flashlights
in his eyes and makes him
sit in his underwear next to the bed.
Making sure he does not
Have a loaded gun
The women cop loved this
and gave him a really good blow job
with the flashlights light
raking across the carpet floor
and some reflecting off
her shiny copper badge.
Then she gave her phone number
to his wife. Do this again I’ll be right here.