A Bag Of Puckering Arseholes
“Oi!, if you bang on that front door
one more sodding time.
I’m throwing down this half-full
pot of piss onto the lot of ya.
I told you that as soon as the last kid
left home so would you be.
Now it’s been 3 months
get over it and move on already.
I’d call the Heddlu
but I’m not threatened in the slightest,
more irritated like.
It’s half past midnight for Christ Sake!
and you’ve brought
your 3 divorced friends ‘round
from The Lamb & Flag
with you for moral support.
Aww, my heart pumps piss for ya,
they couldn’t save
their own cowing marriages.
I’ll be Damned
if they’ll be doing owt for yours.
Now, fuck off and take ‘em
bag of puckering arsehole mates with ya
before I let the new dog out, ya useless cunt!”
© Paul Tristram 2016